So, I was looking on the IMDB Top 250 list the other day for some movies to watch and I came across Blade Runner at #103.  I heard about the movie before but never had much interest in it because I’m not a huge science-fiction fan, but I was bored so I decided to watch it.  Oh my god, Blade Runner is one of the worst movies I have ever watched.  Be forewarned, some of my criticism may spoil the movie.  Then again, you might want to thank me for saving 2 hours of your life.

First off, people in the 1980’s sucked at predicting the future.  The movie is set in 2019 and Los Angeles is all screwed up with flying cars and pipes that shoot fire into the air.  I think it’s a bit stupid for a director or script writer or anyone to try and predict other worlds filled with robots and flying cars in a year when that person will probably still be alive.  Then again, it’s not 2019 yet so I could be wrong.  Also, the 80s was probably the worst decade for fashion ever.  All of that plastic shit that has spikes coming out of the shoulders and led lights in the crotch is so cheesy, I have no idea why anyone thought it was a good idea or why they thought people in the future would ever want to wear it.

Another thing I found to be a bit annoying was how the main dude fell in love with the secretary girl in about 5 minutes.  That made no sense to me…why the hell did they like each other so much?  The only thing they talked about outside the robot test was the robot owl and her fake memories–not exactly what I’d call romantic.  I’m going to skip the middle of the movie because it was boring and stupid, boil it down to the guy flying around in his car trying to find robots and the most annoying chase scene ever.  At the end he finally finds the other two robot people and kills them, but not before one of them decides to give a cheesy speech with something about teardrops and rain.  And it’s not that I don’t “get it”–life and death, robots with emotions, slavery, etc.  It all makes sense, it just shouldn’t require the slowest 2 hours ever to get that point across.  And most movies that do get that point across at least make you feel connected in some way to the person who’s gonna die.  I didn’t feel that at all in this movie.

And while the movie itself if bad, the reviews on IMDB make it even worse.  Most of the people who claim to love this movie have a holier-than-thou attitude, basically saying “if you don’t like this movie it’s because you’re too stupid to get it.”  Like I said, I get it, but I think there are plenty of other movies that make the same point in a much more enjoyable way.  It reminds me of some English classes where people talk for 3 hours about why a shitty poem used the word sweltering instead of hot.  Oh well, to each his own.

One other note: I think I watched the Director’s Cut version of the movie.  I read somewhere that the original is better, but at this point there is no way in hell I’m going to try and watch it again.  Overall, I’d recommend you find something better to watch.